Peek A Boo, and More Milk, too!

Callie was at home with various Aunties and a Grammy for the first part of last week because Tommy (one of her babysitters) was sick, then I had a 4 day weekend. So she went back to Tommy and Betty's yesterday, aftera bit of a vacation.

I think that she was glad to be back in her regular routine (like her Mama that way!) because she was in a fabulous mood last night.

I was holding her in the kitchen, talking to her Daddy, when she started squealing at him and ducking her head into my shoulder. When he smiled back at her, the game was on.

Squeal! Smile! Duck! (lather, rinse, repeat.)


Side note: I'm not producing quite enough milk to keep up with her, so I've been blowing through my freezer stash, while doing everything I can think of to up my supply: extra pumping, Reglan, drinking so much water I think I'm going to float away... this morning, I broke down and sent a can of formula to the babysitter's with her, which she refused. BUT! I broke records with both at-work pumping sessions today, so there's hope! I'm still not quite there yet, but things are looking up. Yay!

Merry Christmas!

Christmas Eve, our tradition is to celebrate Christmas Eve at home...

Christmas morning at Grandma's....

About 40 minutes ago...

We wish you wonderful times spent enjoying the company of family and friends and remembering the miraculous birth of Jesus - the best Gift ever!

A Baby's Hug

Below is a random email forward that really spoke to me today. I'm learning that my favorite people are not always Callie's favorite people (or maybe it's the other way around). Maybe there's a lesson in that...

We were the only family with children in the restaurant. I sat Erik in a high chair and noticed everyone was quietly sitting and talking.

Suddenly, Erik squealed with glee and said, 'Hi.' He pounded his fat baby hands on the high chair tray. His eyes were crinkled in laughter and his mouth was bared in a toothless grin, as he wriggled and giggled with merriment. I looked around and saw the source of his merriment. It was a man whose pants were baggy with a zipper at half-mast and his toes poked out of would-be shoes. His shirt was dirty and his hair was uncombed and unwashed. His whiskers were too short to be called a beard and his nose was so varicose it looked like a road map. We were too far from him to smell, but I was sure he smelled..

His hands waved and flapped on loose wrists. 'Hi there, baby; hi there, big boy. I see ya, buster,' the man said to Erik. My husband and I exchanged looks, 'What do we do?' Erik continued to laugh and answer, 'Hi.'

Everyone in the restaurant noticed and looked at us and then at the man. The old geezer was creating a nuisance with my beautiful baby. Our meal came and the man began shouting from across the room, 'Do ya patty cake? Do you know peek-a-boo? Hey, look, he knows peek- a-boo.'

Nobody thought the old man was cute. He was obviously drunk. My husband and I were embarrassed. We ate in silence; all except for Erik, who was running through his repertoire for the admiring skid-row bum, who in turn, reciprocated with his cute comments.

We finally got through the meal and headed for the door. My husband went to pay the check and told me to meet him in the parking lot. The old man sat poised between me and the door. 'Lord, just let me out of here before he speaks to me or Erik,' I prayed.

As I drew closer to the man, I turned my back trying to sidestep him and avoid any air he might be breathing. As I did, Erik leaned over my arm, reaching with both arms in a baby's 'pick-me-up' position. Before I could stop him, Erik had propelled himself from my arms to the man.

Suddenly a very old smelly man and a very young baby consummated their love and kinship. Erik in an act of total trust, love, and submission laid his tiny head upon the man's ragged shoulder.

The man's eyes closed, and I saw tears hover beneath his lashes. His aged hands full of grime, pain, and hard labor, cradled my baby's bottom and stroked his back. No two beings have ever loved so deeply for so short a time.I stood awestruck. The old man rocked and cradled Erik in his arms and his eyes opened and set squarely on mine. He said in a firm commanding voice, 'You take care of this baby.'Somehow I managed, 'I will,' from a throat that contained a stone.

He pried Erik from his chest, lovingly and longingly, as though he were in pain. I received my baby, and the man said, 'God bless you, ma'am, you've given me my Christmas gift.' I said nothing more than a muttered thanks. With Erik in my arms, I ran for the car.

My husband was wondering why I was crying and holding Erik so tightly, and why I was saying, 'My God, my God, forgive me.'

I had just witnessed Christ's love shown through the innocence of a tiny child who saw no sin, who made no judgment; a child who saw a soul, and a mother who saw a suit of clothes. I was a Christian who was blind, holding a child who was not.

I felt it was God asking, 'Are you willing to share your son for a moment?' when He shared His for all eternity.

How did God feel when he put his baby in our arms 2000 years ago. The ragged old man, unwittingly, had reminded me, 'To enter the Kingdom of God , we must become as little children.'Sometimes, it takes a child to remind us of what is really important. We must always remember who we are, where we came from and, most importantly, how we feel about others. The clothes on your back or the car that you drive or the house that you live in does not define you at all; it is how you treat your fellow man that identifies who you are.

Three Months (yesterday) and/or 13 Weeks (yesterday)

I know it's out of focus, but she was just talking away!

fell asleep on her back this morning. She hasn't done that since probably 5 weeks old...

Isn't my girl beautiful?

I love this one. She was in such a great mood last night!

If I don't teach her anything else...

I want for my daughter to understand this, and know it. It took me a long time to believe it, and I have it posted on my office wall to remind myself. Self, take note:

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves - Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? Actually, who are you NOT to be? You are a child of God! Your playing small doesn't serve the world. There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We were born to manifest the glory of God that is within us. It is not just in some of us; it is in everyone. As we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others." -- Nelson Mandela

30 minutes of mindless wandering, and I found this:

and, here I sit, still laughing....

oh - and a side note: I'm 5 stubborn pounds from pre-thislast-pregnancy weight! (15 from last July's...)

Anonymous Comments

I really want to be able to leave the option open for my dear readers (ie., sisters, family, and non-blogging friends) to comment without having a blogger id. However, I DO want to know who you are when you comment. If you're going to comment "anonymously", could you puh-lese not be so anonymous and leave your name and where I may "know" you from?

Thanks, and have a great day.

Very Important Updates

1) Linus is now Buster, and has a new home. Lucy misses him terribly.

2) My baby decided yesterday that she'll eat from a bottle. In fact, I left 18 ozs. of milk with them yesterday, figuring that there'd be some leftover to freeze, and she ate it all except for maybe 2 ozs. The babysitters are much less stressed out and she doesn't have to be all bottle all the time, as I had feared - she'll take it from them and I can still breastfeed when she's with me.

3) I'm surviving working mommyhood. I remembered that I'm good at my job and I like it. So much better than having to go to a job that one hates....

Let the Reader Beware, Part 2

What Jessica Means

You are fair, honest, and logical. You are a natural leader, and people respect you. You never give up, and you will succeed... even if it takes you a hundred tries. You are rational enough to see every part of a problem. You are great at giving other people advice. You are friendly, charming, and warm. You get along with almost everyone. You work hard not to rock the boat. Your easy going attitude brings people together. At times, you can be a little flaky and irresponsible. But for the important things, you pull it together. You are the total package - suave, sexy, smart, and strong. You have the whole world under your spell, and you can influence almost everyone you know. You don't always resist your urges to crush the weak. Just remember, they don't have as much going for them as you do. You tend to be pretty tightly wound. It's easy to get you excited... which can be a good or bad thing. You have a lot of enthusiasm, but it fades rather quickly. You don't stick with any one thing for very long. You have the drive to accomplish a lot in a short amount of time. Your biggest problem is making sure you finish the projects you start. You are very open. You communicate well, and you connect with other people easily. You are a naturally creative person. Ideas just flow from your mind. A true chameleon, you are many things at different points in your life. You are very adaptable. You are usually the best at everything ... you strive for perfection. You are confident, authoritative, and aggressive. You have the classic "Type A" personality.

What's" Your Name's Hidden Meaning?

Let the Reader Beware

Don't say I never warned you:

You Are Paper

Crafty and creative, you are able to adapt freely to almost any situation. People tend to underestimate you, unless they've truly seen what you are capable of. Deep down, you're always scheming and thinking up new plans. Your mind is constantly active. You are quite capable of anything you dream of. You can always figure out a way to get what you want. You can wrap a rock person up in your sheet of trickery. A scissor person can sneak up and cut you to pieces. When you fight: No one can anticipate your next move If someone makes you mad: You'll attack them mercilessly when they're unprepared

Are You Rock, Paper, or Scissors?

Child of God

We've waited such a long time for this day, and are so grateful for the opportunity to baptize our daughter.

Praise God!

The Laumoorittskers

Doesn't this look like a fun and fabulous group? Membership is severely limited, and since the youngest sister got married this past summer, any future members will have to be born in.

My husband went deer hunting

and all he brought home was this poor, dumped off, starving puppy...


=
+

There he was, shivering and all hunkered down in the ditch. Once my eagle-eyed husband had seen him and realized that puppy was alive, he couldn't leave him there.

The vet says that he doesn't have ANY health problems, except that he's hungry and has some fleas that are presently being eradicated (yuk!) and that he's very smart and has huge paws.

Anyone know anyone that wants a dog? If he's not gone by the end of the weekend, I'll be forced to keep him and his name will be Linus.

Photographic Treats ... or Callie and the Crazy Church Ladies

This is Gloria and Tracie. Gloria had unwavering Faith (when I did NOT) that Callie would, in fact, be born all safe and sound and healthy and strong. When I was 4 1/2 weeks pregnant, she "claimed this baby in the name of Jesus" and would not hear of any fears that anything would happen to her.
Lori and Leslie. Those crazy ladies will do anything to see a baby smile... :)

...and it usually works!

I keep not getting a picture of Wendy, so this will have to do.

Holding her head up sooo well!
napping with Lucy

and too cool for school in our Bumbo and polkadots.

For the Record

I started to type a comment in response to an Anonymous comment to my last post about going back to work, and then I thought I'd just post instead.

"anybody can stay home if they choose, it's just a matter of choosing between your priorities ... I hope you're able to double check the math and consider giving up a few of your luxuries if you really want to stay home with your new baby. It's just a matter of making a few choices of what's most important to you!"

We have done the math. We have considered the expenses that would go away if I weren't working. We have looked at downsizing vehicles. We have looked at selling our home. Remember, I've been home for almost four months, most of it unpaid leave. What we came up with is that, even with trimming all the fat that we can stand, it is simply not feasible for me to stay at home. We would still need to come up with several hundred dollars a month. Wes could do it with side work, but I need to see my husband, Callie needs to see her father, and Wes needs time to relax. I'm not willing for him to spend all of his time working so that I can stay at home. I don't feel that it's fair to him or to me. He didn't sign up to spend all his time working and I didn't sign up to be a single parent.

So if the "luxury" that I'd be giving up is my husband's happiness, sanity, or availability as a father and partner, I'm just not willing to do it. If the choice is him working his 8-10 hours a day PLUS mine, I'm not willing to ask him to do it. If the choice is eeking by and not being able to build up savings or enjoy our family, I'm not willing to do it.

In a few years, I may be able to stay home. I hope so. But right now, we have made the choices of what's most important to us.


And I reserve the right to think that sometimes it is an easier pill to swallow than others. It's my blog and I'll cry if I want to.

Back to Work

I got an email from my boss, asking me to come back on Monday. In the interest of a paycheck to take some of the load off of my wonderful Husband, I am.

I'm not ready. But then, I don't think that I ever would be. I've pretty much been home for 3 1/2 months. I've gotten into a routine. I've never really wanted to be a working mom. I think it sucks that I have to be. But I do, and I know that.

Wes asked if it would have been easier on me (emotionally) to go back when Callie was six weeks old - back then, she was pretty much sleeping all day. I wouldn't have known that 10 am and 2 pm are Happy Times, I'd only know about the 6 am and 5 pm ones.

I don't know - is that how other working moms survive? If you don't know what you're missing, you don't miss it so much? Maybe their hearts are breaking just as much as mine is and they just hide it better. Maybe I'll adjust and Callie will be just fine.

Hilarity

Elf Youself is back!

I can't tell you how many hours of laugh-till-the-tears-are-running-down-your-cheeks entertainment this little gizmo provided me last year. Someone that I know made one of the Senior Management Team at our company and I thought I would pee myself.

make your own:
http://elfyourself.jibjab.com/

I particularly like the screen that says "Adjust Your Head".

See below for my family - dancing away!

Hilarity in the barn

Send your own ElfYourself eCards

Rollercoaster Day of Firsts

Callie had her 2 month check-up today.

She's 10 lbs, 12 ozs, and 23 inches long. 50th percentile for both.

She also had vaccines. Four of them. One that she drank, the other three were shots. Smart Dr Simon made ME feed her the one that she drank (and spit half of it out) and the "girls" give her the actual shots. Callie cried a very heartbreaking New Cry, but seemed to calm down. (I gave her some Tylenol 30 minutes before we went.)
We got home, nursed, and conked out.

After about an hour, I could hear her on the moniter, fussing a little. I waited for a minute, because she usually puts herself back to sleep. Then, her fussing started to sound like playing, so I went to investigate.

My baby girl had ROLLED OVER and was laying on her back, just kicking and cooing and playing away!

So, we got up, played a little, ate some more, fell back asleep.

This is the point that, were I a Good Mom, I would have given her more Tylenol.

She woke up again at 3:30. Not slowly, like normal, this was all of a sudden and she had a Whole New Cry/Scream. She was inconsolable for a good 25 or 30 minutes, before I managed to get another dose of Tylenol into her. She then cried/screamed/sobbed for the longest 15 minutes of my whole life before she settled enough to nurse. (Is there anything more heartbreaking than a baby screaming as if in pain while nursing?)

She's asleep now, just a little sob every now and then, eyes squeezed shut and hanging on to my shirt for dear life.

I think that I don't like Shots Day.
Except that my baby rolled over all by herself. Let's end on that. :)

Christmas Shopping

Is it super ridiculous that Wes and I are going Christmas shopping tomorrow? What about that we have a list and plan to be Finished by mid-afternoon?

I thought so.

We won't put the tree up until Christmas Eve, I promise. We have THREE Christmas trees and I don't know where any of them are. I also don't know where any of the decorations are. Well, except for the handful that we got for Christmas last year (mid-move)....

Comments

I just realized that I had the permissions for comments set to where you have to have a blogger or open id log in to comment. I didn't mean it. It's fixed now, and anyone can comment.
Callie's Aunties - this means you. :)

Babysitters

Callie and I went to visit her babysitters yesterday. I keep putting it off, but I ran out of excuses yesterday afternoon. Tommy and Betty go to our church. They keep two little boys, ages 2 and 4, who seem to love them. They don't believe in letting babies cry. I know that they will love her and that she will love them. Mama's just having a hard time letting go.
sigh.

Moore Look-alike Meter

Whatever. She looks like Wes wa-a-ay more than she looks like me. But I think that the meter is a cool idea.

She can put herself to sleep!!!

This morning, Callie was really fussy, so I layed her on her tummy on a blanket on our bed to play while I was switching some laundry around. In about 2 minutes, she was asleep. (Thinking it was a fluke) I went ahead and finished what I was doing. She was still sleeping, so I went ahead and got myself ready to leave. (Visit to the chiropractor - yay!) She was STILL SLEEPING half an hour later, so I picked her up to put her in her carseat to leave. My wonderful baby did not wake up - not for the transition to the carseat, not when I put her in the car, not when we walked into the chirpractic office. In fact, I had a 10 minute treatment and was about halfway through the second one when she finally stirred.

This may be the soundest sleeping since the End of the Milk Coma.

I put her in her crib (slightly awake, full belly, clean diaper) about 20 minutes ago for her afternoon nap and haven't heard anything out of her... (yes, she's asleep. I present as evidence the photo at the top of this post)

So I ask you experienced mamas: Do babies sleep more soundly if they put themselves to sleep?

Random Photographic Updates

Our Goddaughter, Maddie, was so-o-o-o proud of herself for getting to hold Callie.
Maddie's parents, Robbie and Shauna, will be two of Callie's Godparents.
Callie has recently discovered that there are lights and butterflies
up there in the top of her swing!

Two of Mama's aunts: Freida and Judith meeting Callie.

(Notice the orange OSU shirt that the baby is wearing.)

Halloween - Cousin Haley is dressed up as Raggedy Ann.
Her hat is sitting on the coffee table in the background...

11/1/08 - Callie's very first Ladies Bible Study! (DaVinci's. Saturdays. 7:30 am. Be there!)

Another Godmother, Leslie, is holding her.

Same bible study, this time, held by Lori. Callie really was happier than she looks!

And, here, Callie is making goo-goo eyes at my friend Dana.

Update

My friend Jenell delivered both babies this morning. One passed during delivery, the other lived for about two hours.

Lord, have mercy.

Begging for a miracle

My friend, Jenell, from my online miscarriage support group. Jenell's first baby was due the same time as my most recent loss. Makenna was stillborn in December at 23 weeks. Jenell is now 22 weeks pregnant with her "Miracle Twins". She's in the hospital now, fighting for them.

Please read her blog and keep her in your prayers.

http://robnjenstwins.blogspot.com/

Callie's Very Busy Week

Callie has been Very Busy this last week....

Meeting her new cousin, Dale.

Hanging out with Daddy, Lucy, and Jack

Growing into the Very Colorful Sleeper that Aunt Sarah got us -
surely the beginning of a long line of polka dotted and striped brightly colored outfits.
Thanks, Aunt Sarah!


Getting Beauty Sleep (preferably in Mama's arms!)
Seems to work, she's more beautiful every day!


Smiling at her Mama!

Talking to Daddy

Helping Grandma Moore paint her kitchen cabinet doors

God's Own Child!

The Godparents have been picked and approved (even that Baptist one!). The aunts and uncles should all be in town. The day has been scheduled with the church.

We will have Callie baptised on the Sunday after Thanksgiving at Redeemer Lutheran Church.

My BIG Girl, Part 2

We had our one month Pediatrician appointment yesterday.

My big girl weighs NINE POUNDS, plus a half an ounce (which puts her in the 50th percentile). She is 20 3/4 inches long, (45th percentile), and her head is 15 cm (80th percentile - all the better to hold her multitude of brains!).

For comparison's sake, at five days old, she was 6 lbs, 8 ozs (25th percentile), 19 inches, and her head was 14 1/4 cm (75th percentile).

Dr. S said that she was "among the best babies" that he'd seen "all day" and that, while he normally expects to see 2 lbs gained each month, he's not worrying about her over achievement at all - "it just means she's eating good." Go us!

My BIG Girl

I realized yesterday that my baby doesn't look like a newborn anymore, she looks like an infant. Her cheeks are filling out, her face looks more mature, and she's starting to get little pudgy arms and legs. She's smiling AT us, and I'm quite sure that it's not "just gas". She's reaching for, and grasping, things (usually the edge of my shirt) with her little hands. She's making eye contact. She's (knock on wood!) sleeping for longer stretches and on a sort of schedule.

And that worry about Lucy being jealous or not liking Callie? She's taken to sleeping on Callie's bedroom floor when Callie's napping.

(shameless pictures of the beautiful baby, sleeping on her "chicken sheets", and then the other baby, sleeping on the floor beside the crib)

And when Callie's on our bed? Lucy wants to be right there. We're working on a new command called "Too Close".

Callie was crying and Lucy was trying to make sure that she was all right. By licking her feet. Callie, like her Mama, isn't too sure about anyone licking her feet.

Random Notes

Callie's birth announcement was in this past Sunday's paper. We were able to identify the baby that the hospital staff mixed Callie's cord blood with. (He has B+ blood, Callie's is O+, like her daddy. Mine is A-. You can imagine our confusion when they told us that HER blood was B+...) We also noticed that the girl that was on the other side of the curtain from us in the pre-check room and thought she was dying at 7:30 am didn't have her baby until 8:30 pm. Must have been a very long day for her!

We may have had our first round of gas yesterday. Poor baby would sleep for 30 minutes, wake up, want to eat, but only eat for 5-10 minutes, and then cry inconsolably for the next half hour. Made for a very long day. The Mylicon drops would work for a little bit, but not long enough. She's much better today, praise God. I don't like it when she cries and it's not because of her diaper or hunger. I want to be able to FIX IT. Today, she slept. And played contentedly in her crib. And slept some more.

And while my weight loss has sort of stalled, Callie's weight gain has been phenominal. She was 7 lbs, 2 ozs at 10 days old and is just a hair over 8 lbs today at 3 weeks! Yay for my big girl!

Daddy has been working a big side job for the last two weeks - leaving at 7:00 am and not getting home until midnight or later, and we miss him. But they should be finished tonight (late late late) and then he should have a good break before the next big project comes up. We've been making due with lunch dates, but it will be really nice to have him home in the evenings again.

Sister #3 is coming down from Omaha this weekend to meet her new niece, so all the Aunties will be in town, which promises to be very fun. I probably won't get a chance to hold my baby until Sunday evening. We are going to Leonardo's (a kind of kid's science museum) and having some general Girl Bonding.

I painted Callie's birds - something I've been meaning to do in her nursery since I got her bedding... a long time ago. I think that they're cute, but have the sneaking suspicion that they are a work in progress...

And - my friend, mentioned a few posts ago, has had some good prayers answered and is in a really good place right now. Actually, she's in a better place than I was 2 weeks out from either of my miscarriages. God is good. (and can He keep right on reminding us?)